….that one person can fulfill all your needs?

I used to buy into the whole “soul mate” thing…and, maybe it’s real for some people…but for me, at least right now, I can’t see it.

I’ve never met anyone like me.  (that might be a good thing) 🙂  And I realize that some of the best relationships are balances of opposites.  If one is a good lawn mower and the other a good cook, they can switch out those jobs to the one better at each and both benefit from that arrangement.  That’s extremely, overly simplistic – but you get the gist.

I have four cats.  When my baby boy came to me it felt like my little family was complete.  Each one filled a certain slot.  Being a spiritual counselor (out of touch for a while, but back in the circle now – yay), I often refer to the elements or the compass points in readings or just to give me an overall touchstone for my own wellbeing.

North, South, East, West; Swords, Pentacles, Cups, Wands; Air, Earth, Water, Fire – on and on…so to have my four babies was just a strange coincidence.  Now, as I contemplate a new life, I wonder if I can manage a Poly lifestyle.  I’d sure like to.  I’d actually love to have this whole camelot compound thing going where all my loved ones, whether friend or lover, have their little cabins and we all share resources and take care of one another – a tribe of people who are all there to live and love.  So, would four partners be too much?

I can almost hear the gasps of horror.  I’m not really even sure I’d want that many men in my life.  They can be a lot of work sometimes.  But then, if they were all cool with it, they could entertain each other as well.  Most men only want time with a woman for certain pleasures…right?  (no rock throwing if you’re one of the guys who really does enjoy the relationship part of things – we’re just talking here)  And women might admit that they want to feel wanted and then be left alone to do what they love to do as well.  How much time do we actually all ever spend in deep, meaningful conversation or sharing?

I’m an INFJ.  Small talk bores me senseless.  I try to pay attention, but I tend to wander off in my head and then return to the conversation somewhere in the middle of “right?” or some other indication that I’m supposed to nod my head.  While the deep talks are amazing and I get excited by them, the mundane stuff just poisons my soul – especially after all the crap I’ve been thru.

Nope.  I want relationships that mean something.  I don’t want to fake listen to some droning on about something that bores me.  Yet, I do want to enjoy the cuddles and kisses and sharing a meal here and there or walks or some really good sex or maybe even an occasional drive or whatever adventures might arise.  Then I want to be left on my bed, kissed gently goodnight and tucked in to enjoy my kitties and tv.  Let everyone have what they need from whom they need it; share, enjoy, be themselves and appreciate what resonates with each.

I’ve always had this dream.  Now, I wonder if it’s possible.  There have to be like-minded people out there…unless my mothership forgot about me and I’m stranded amongst the humans with no hope of rescue.  heehee